Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
The power of my boobs compel you
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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