So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
