Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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