Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize
