Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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