I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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