you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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