It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
