Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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