I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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