Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
