whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Randomize
