the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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