He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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