She said her name was "party"
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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