Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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