Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
