so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
