his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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