If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
