dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
