So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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