I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
So many bounce houses so little time
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
