Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Randomize
