Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
