David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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