I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
a search helicopter?!
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
