the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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