So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
