You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize