If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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