I was born with a shot glass in my hand
honey bunches of taint.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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