You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize