Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
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