Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize