Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
