don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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