He had one of those small greek statue penises
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
