Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
there was a trapeze. enough said
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize
