dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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