problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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