Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
