is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
