do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
