Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
