I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Randomize