Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
