This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
