thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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