"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
